Mosh News - Wednesday 11 April

Lily isn’t a Victim

‘LDN is a Victim’, a ‘not as clever as it thinks’ parody of Kate Nash and Lily Allen’s middle class sensibilities has come under fire from Lily herself. ”So what if we’re middle class? Just cause your mum was too lazy to get her fat ass off the sofa and make some cash. I shouldn’t be able to make tunes” quipped the normally shy and retiring popstrel.



Flicking the Bird

Remember the days when they took canaries down the mines? Well that may be preferable to living with Keith Richards. The prune faced rocker apparently once threw Ron Wood’s son Jamie’s pet canary out a window having mistaken it for an alarm clock. I know how he feels; I’ve been pointing tourists seeking Big Ben to the penguin enclosure for years.

Mosh News - Thursday 5 April

Don’t Cry For Me

Never one to shirk from jumping on a bandwagon, Madonna has embraced the new rave scene by crying tears of neon. Graffiti artists defaced a UK billboard by cutting out her eye and pouring lurid green paint through the hole. The Klaxons immediately admitted defeat and withdrew their album from the charts.



Green Day in the Nursery

Have Green Day in your window box. The alternative 90’s punks who turned mainstream have had a plant named after them by a Swiss botanist. Macrocarpaea dies-viridis is a willowy plant wearing too much eyeliner…(I’m guessing here)

Mosh News - Monday 2 April

Paris' Eyeful Tower

Failed pop star and crash test dummy Paris Hilton is alledged to have had her assests expanded. I met her at a backstage party at the UK Wireless festival last year and those two were definately not on the guestlist.





Festival Gets Flooded

Glastonbury sold out at the weekend in 90 minutes. The 260,000 who failed to secure tickets will get a second chance on 22 April. But please be aware if you do buy a ticket you will have to listen to The Who. You have been warned.




World's Dullest Annoucement

EMI and Apple's highly anticipated announcement today amounted to be nothing more than a releasing of DRM across"some" tracks. The tracks will also be of a better quality...how about Beatles quality? huh? any day now would be fine?!




Dr Love Machine

8.9 million people tuned in to see Dr Who's new assistant on the BBC at the weekend. Quite frankly the figure would have doubled had they gone with our suggestion of Girls Aloud's Cheryl Cole. We're going to start hounding Popjustice and Dr Who Forums and make this a reality...just see if we don't!